I’m ten days into this 31 days of writing challenge. I don’t have much to say today, this extrovert is worn out, which takes a lot, but I have been reflecting on what I’m learning through writing each day.
I’m learning about discipline. I am very good at starting things, but I haven’t quite learned how to finish them. I tend to start strong and then my commitment wears down. This challenge is really helping me follow through on the commitment, and believe that I can follow through. I believe that God honors showing up, even when I don’t feel like, even when the quality isn’t what I’m capable of. There have been days when I’ve written my heart out, and days where I’m just thankful that I’m long winded and can easily string words together, even if my heart isn’t there.
I’m learning to breathe deeper and walk a little bit slower. In college, I had a hard time walking to class with friends. I’m a people weaver and my temper flares when people are not moving quickly enough for my liking. As I’ve been reflecting on grace this month, I’ve been trying to slow down and open my eyes to what’s going on around me. The constant rush mode that I live in is not sustainable or healthy.
The pressure to write each day has forced me into more constant communication with God. I’m reminded that He is the Creator and I must remain in Him to draw my strength and voice. I’m not creating for my own sake, but to bring glory to Him. While in more constant communication with Him, my eyes are opened to what He is doing around me, instead of plowing through and seeing people and things as items on my to-do list.
In the past ten days, I have been able look at areas of my life where I’m desperate for more grace. There are deep places in my heart desperate for God’s grace to heal and redeem me. I’m praying that in the next 21 days, I can continue to be brave and bold, seeking after what God would want me to learn about His grace.