To those on the outside, my life may seem pretty put together. And most days, it can be, but it is not my own power or strength that this is the case. I am a broken little sinner in desperate need of a savior; mine comes in the form of Jesus Christ. Since I got back from spring break, and this whole semester, I’ve realized how easy it is for it to look that I keep myself together – that it’s based on my power that I do what I do with a smile on my face. On days that I try to do things by my own power, I usually roll my eyes, complain and say things that are not of God.
Colossians 1:17 says of Christ, “He is before all things, and in him all things hold together”. The same is true of my life. Without the power of the Holy Spirit and the example and love of Jesus, I would not be the person I am today. The relationships I have with people, while I love them, I could not love them well without Jesus. In Christ, my life is held together. In Christ, I have it all together. In Christ I am complete.
Sometimes in my life, I try to do things on my own power. I try to serve people myself, but unless I’m asking God how to best serve them, I fail. I’ve been asking God to show me the balance of embracing my brokenness without celebrating it; in being vulnerable without crossing boundaries. It is a difficult balance. My flesh tends to celebrate my brokenness and cross boundaries – not always pointing people to Jesus. I don’t have my life together. I didn’t have my life together a year and a half ago when I became a Christian. The beauty of Jesus is that He alone can keep me together. He alone can perfect and complete me. When I’m confident of this, and walking in this truth, I’m so much more able to acknowledge the broken little mess that I am, but celebrate the way that He is constantly remaking me.